Happy New Year, one and all; a bit late, but one so hates to rush into things.... There are many phrases I dislike ...products of advertising, journalistic hysteria, or public relations. Oddly enough, yoof-speak irritates me much less - if only because I assume they'll grow out of it; but actually also because it doesn't come from that sloppy world of ad-men all trying to sell me something. One of the many phrases for which I should like to introduce the death-penalty for all who use it is "the wow factor"; does your work have the w-f? Don't we all aspire to it...? Depends a bit on what, if anything, makes you say "wow", I suppose. For some, it might be Andy Warhol - but God alone knows, or anyway I don't, how ... The reason I don't get Warhol is, I suspect, that there's nothing to get.... Or it might be Dalí - and yet, I doubt it. It wouldn't be Edward Hopper - there isn't the immediacy; perhaps instead there's something rather more rewarding... I don't know that I want the "wow-factor" ... always assuming I could achieve it. I have looked at paintings that have drawn an immediate intake of breath - but I can't think of many. I've read books that have excited me and captured my imagination while I was reading them - but have rarely read them again. What after all happens AFTER the wow-factor? Is there any further nourishment to be gained, or was that it... As you might have guessed and probably did, all this arises because I was told - in a tremendously caring way, naturally! - some time ago that my work didn't have the wow-factor. Well, we are easily wounded, here at Obscurity Central, so for a moment I took this seriously and wondered what I could do about it.... How does one transform oneself from a caterpillar into a butterfly? How does Mr Dull become Prince Twinkletoes, glittering irresistibly at potential customers? Many have tried; gimmicks have been employed ... Chris Ofili incorporated elephant dung! Maybe I could use ratsh...... no; no, I couldn't... Tracey offered her unmade bed - well, mine is a squalid as hers, easily, but .. it's been done. And did they work, anyway? Was it the wow-factor which commanded attention? I have concluded several things. One, I don't know what the w-f is - perhaps I'm not predisposed to tremendous surges of excitement, but it isn't the shock value that appeals to me about any art form, perhaps painting least of all. Two, if I did know, I still wouldn't be able to command it to come when called - and what do you do if you can't summon up the w-f? Wait, doing nothing, until inspiration strikes? Isn't that the classic amateur way of doing things? Three, how long can such an impression be retained anyway? You may say wow once, if that's your idea of a good time, but what sustains your interest beyond that? Do you start looking for little flaws, try to find the feet of clay in the idol you at first admired? Probably better to stop trying to see things from other people's point of view, and just explore my own instead; so conclusion number Four is, I shall do what interests me in the hope that it might interest others, but not with that specific intention in mind; will reflect that my favourite painting remains Corot's Souvenir d'Italie, for which the words "quiet" and "reflective" might have been invented, but which does not necessarily knock one's socks off at first viewing. Comment from friends who may or may not know much about art (but know what they like, invariably...) can be enormously helpful. They can also be completely misleading - and reflect little more than the minuscule attention-span that plagues too many of us in a world that seems to move too fast.