Untitled

Executed very well Fiona no problems there, but I feel maybe the tree shape at the left blends with the sky shape making a X in centre. Maybe the vanishing point in middle hard to say but see what you mean. Still a 'goodie' though!

Fiona, I agree with Carole about the shape formed where the sky and tree meet at the centre of the picture, but I really like the brighter colours you've used in this one.

Lovely painting Fiona the tree and rock are great and the sky but I would crop part of the right and make it more prominent

Thank you for your feedback Carole, Jenny and Dennis. Yes it&#39;s that &#39;V&#39; or &#39;X&#39; shape I think that was putting me off the composition. I&#39;ve re-drawn it and I think if I alter the cloud formations around it might do the trick. Dennis, Instead of cropping, how about adding some &#39;scrub&#39; or &#39;shrub&#39; on the right? <br />Thanks again!

Hi Fiona. Lovely pen and wash once again. Reading the comments, is it ok to add mine? I just think that the sky is too heavy and draws the eye away from your focal point. Hope someone will correct me if I am wrong!!!?????

I want your imput Jennifer and thank you. I&#39;m having another go at it, looser this time and yes the sky is a part I intend to change. I&#39;m not clever enough to do good moody skies, I always over do them...well spotted. Thanks again Jennifer.

These comments are very constructive Fiona, I saw this yesterday and didn&#39;t particularly like the composition, partly because of the X configuration which has been pointed out. Definitely hasn&#39;t got the Wow factor, more the X -factor. Back to the drawing board I think!

I agree with Jennifer about the sky being too heavy here.

Thank you Alan and Louise......it&#39;s unanimous about the &#39;X&#39; composition and the heavy sky....it&#39;s a disaster darlings!!lol

Perhaps I was a little blunt in my comment. There are lots of good bits here but you know that. The colours in the foreground are lovely, especially that touch of ultramarine..it&#39;s just that heavy sky.. I was going to add, weighing it down, but won&#39;t.. Remember that bridge and heather when you were sorry that you&#39;d asked..LOL

Yes I would add something strong on the right Fiona and it would subdue the sky perfect. Definitely worth it I would say

No Louise not blunt.....honest, which I appreciate. Don&#39;t remind me of the &#39;bridge&#39; episode I&#39;m still not over it!lol In fact I feel a relapse coming on.....! Thanks again.<br /><br />Thank you Dennis, I will.X<br /><br />

I think a big, red Parrot, coming in to land on that tree is the answer, Fiona! Either that, or alternatively, being festive, a massive Partridge, or Turkey even. ??

Great idea Jennifer yes Fiona go for it

Jennifer, Dennis......you&#39;re bonkers!!!! lol. I&#39;m rubbish at birds....!!!

Nice painting Fiona, but agree with some of the comments regarding the sky on the right hand side, think it should be a bit lighter in tone, with also possibly introducing some more of a snow shadow colour into the foreground. Not trying to be super critical Fiona but just making a couple of suggestion which I think would make the completed painting stronger, but like the overall atmosphere you have created in this piece.

Such simplicity - and it works so well.

Well, you know me by now, Fiona! I must have my pennyworth. Two things strike me about this painting; the first is that the rock by the base of the foreground tree is too dominant; it is too large and seems to be out of proportion with the tree and it&#39;s immediate surroundings. The second is that whilst the left-hand hillside sweeps down to the waters edge, the right-hand one seems to be painted entirely as &quot;distance&quot; - there is no middle-ground texture where the hills and water meet, as there is on the left. It needs a shrub or two closest to the viewer. And whilst we are at it, the left-hand waterline needs to peter out a bit more in the distance to aid recession. Actually, there is a third element to this and that is, I really like your more colourful palette. And I think the sky is great!!

It&#39;s fantastic Fiona but Carole is offering good advice , if you simplified the sky you would see the tree more I think you already know anyway , A good rule busy landscape simple sky busy sky simple landscape . it&#39;s still a very nice painting as it is but it could be even better . happy Christmas Fiona and thank you so very much for your kind comments this year .

Much has been said and I agree with but my biggest gripe would be the too heavy sky at first view, The composition works well for me and it&#39;s a classic Phipps palette.

Many thanks Graham, Michael, Lionel, Dennis and Derek for you valued imput. I&#39;ve had some good advice re improvements for this piece, which I hope to address in the next one. Thanks again everyone for taking the time to comment.

Interesting reading and good advice too,Fiona. I&#39;m going to wait for the improved version, perhaps you have sent it already, I&#39;m a bit behind with the gallery.

I like the way the &quot;V&quot; of the sky is mirrored in the &quot;V&quot; shape of the water and I like your brighter palette too Fiona.

Thanks very much Satu and Val for your feedback....much appreciated. I&#39;ve finished mark 2....still not right!lol There could be a third......

Hi Fiona , you captured a lovely atmosphere in this and it&#39;s competently executed , for me the problem is the tree is guiding me out of the picture as its leaning to the left and the branches are following the general direction leading of to the left ....It is very well executed either way :)

A lovey pen and wash picture, Fiona, and I love your winter tree and the grasses peeping through the snow. Maybe I would make the sky just a little simpler.

Dermot, no one else mentioned the tree!!!!lol I&#39;ve done mark 2 and I left the tree going in the same direction....bother. I am more than likely going to do it again but even more looser than this so will attempt to rectify the tree. Thank you very much for your help.<br /><br />Thank very much Chandra, I&#39;ve done another version and have made the sky simpler, however it&#39;s not that good lots of runs and cauliflowers...fortunately I don&#39;t mind those, in moderation.